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When Monuments Fall

Photo of the Norwich Martin Luther King Jr. Center- Courtesy of The Day Newspaper

This building has so much significance for me. As a child and a teenager I spent a lot of afternoons here. They hosted summer programs, churches held events there, we practiced for plays and showcases. It was a place of gathering with friends, sharing meals, having baby showers, or just hanging out. The Martin Luther King Jr. Center was a hub of resources for many things– you could go there if you needed to access to a printer or if you needed to visit the food bank. With the passing of time and the diminishing of resources this building eventually closed and now is scheduled to be demolished.

When I read this article from The Day a flood of memories overtook me because this place meant a lot to my childhood. This building represents the times and seasons of shared community in my youth. However, it also made me think of other instances in my life where monuments have been removed or destroyed and what those things could mean both to me personally, and to us, as a community/society.

Recently, with the invigoration of the Black Lives Matter Movement, we saw a trend of removing monuments. Monuments to Christopher Columbus were rallied against and legally taken down. Sometimes, if no legal recourse was found, activists took down these monuments themselves. The razing of these physical totems represented the tearing down of old ideals, the refusal to accept incorrect and biased historical narratives, the expressed anger of people tired of being lied to and oppressed, and the call to action for more intentional reflection about who and what we praise, protect, and proliferate.

Personally, I acutely remember the recent removal of a well-known and prominent tree from my high school campus. This tree represented the friendships, community, and time I spent around it and under it during my high school years. When it was removed from the campus it represented the changing needs of a new community of students, implementation of new mores and ideals about privacy and campus safety, and the very real consideration that it’s dropping limbs were dangerous. Despite understanding all of this, the tree remains as a centerpiece in my high school experiences.

The thing is, it’s not just a building. It’s not just a statue. It’s not just a tree. These monuments represent something and they point to greater realities. I think when monuments fall it causes us all to reflect on how things have changed. The removal of this building will hopefully signal new energy for bringing community and resources into Norwich (which we definitely need). It is my hope that we will gather to consider what can be rebuilt or newly crafted to meet the needs of kids, teens, and young adults who were the majority of those served by the MLK Center.

As these monuments fall, it calls all of us to consider the change in times. Who were we, once before? Who are we now? What are we missing that we need? What else do we need to tear down or build up? And for me, I ask myself; what can I do to fill the gaps that so glaringly remain?

Today, I reflect and am grateful for the people and the times that the MLK Center represents in my own life. I also realize that between my time there and becoming the woman that I am today, I have had to tear down and build up many things in my own life. I have watched many monuments fall in my own journey and despite the pain, the hurt, and the nostalgia, I am honestly better for it all. I face the future with hope and expectation that these fallen monuments, including the MLK Center, have created space for something new, something better, something birthed by young and able minds to usher us all towards better and better tomorrows.

Cultivating Gratitude

Gratitude-rock

What are you grateful for?

This year has been one of the most difficult years of my adult life.  It seemed like I was dealing with a whirlwind of balancing life changes, family issues, relationship problems and all that comes with raising a toddler.  I knew as the year transitioned that I was facing a trying time.  In the past, I realized that I often allowed my circumstances to dictate how I felt from day to day and would often be plagued with worry, doubt, depression, fear (and all of the many manifestations.

However, I decided this this time it would be different.  This time I would make different choices and not allow myself to get into a negative spiral.  To do this, I decided that I would practice gratefulness.

Everyday, before I got out of bed I began a litany of everything I was grateful for.  I thanked God for breath, being able to wake up, having strength in my body, having clean clothes to wear.  I thanked Him for EVERYTHING.  Throughout the day if I found myself in doubt or fear or worry, immediately, I would change my thinking and begin to count all the things I was grateful for.  Thank you for a car to drive.  Thank you for gas in my tank.  Thank you that my bank account is not negative.  I began to intentionally cultivate gratitude.

I allowed gratitude to become my response to everything.  If I didn’t have enough money to purchase something I wanted, I just thanked God that I had a job and that I would not always be in this position.  If I was tired and overwhelmed, I just thanked God that I had a place I could go to rest that was peaceful and safe.  Instead of focusing on the negative, I found the positive in everything.

Overtime, this practice transformed from something I did, to who I am.  I began to have the character of gratefulness and positivity.  In any situation, I wouldn’t respond negatively because my mind was already conditioned to see the good in every occurrence.  Cultivating gratitude became second nature and it sprouted an unexpected fruit: JOY.

During this time, despite what I was going through and all the things that I might have wished to change, I found that I had unexplainable JOY.  I would find myself laughing while riding in the car (wondering to myself why I was so happy!) Or, just getting up everyday full of life and energy to achieve whatever I could that day.  Through cultivating gratitude, I found JOY.  That joy was not based on circumstances or material things, but it was birthed through gratefulness.

I am a firm believer in cultivating gratefulness and it’s ability to change your mind and change your perspective.  Cultivating gratitude is life changing.  It can:

  • Motivate us towards health and fitness goals,
  • Boosts feel-good hormones (endorphins) in our brains
  • Help with depression,
  • Improve relationships
  • Help us to sleep better
  • Change our belief systems to be more empathetic, compassionate and fulfulling

Begin to practice gratefulness today and watch you life change!

Don’t delay.  Future YOU is waiting for your arrival!

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The Company We Keep

Company we keep

Have you ever felt like you were struggling to realize success in your life?

Have you ever experienced a burning desire for change but found yourself unable to take the necessary steps?

I dealt with this a number of times in my life, and sometimes, the issue is not within you, but outside of you.  Sometimes, the issue is the company we keep.

Motivational speaker Jim Rohn says that we are the “average of the five people we spend the most time with.”  Take a few moments and consider your closest circle.  Do you consider this to be true?  It may be truer than you even believe it is!  If we are trying to succeed or change our current circumstances, who we surround ourselves with is of the utmost importance.  Whether we believe it or not, birds of a feather flock together!  Consider how you can incorporate more people into your network that reflect the direction that you want to go in.  Mentors, counselors, business leaders, teachers– consider who is most able to help you acquire the information and resources that you need to be successful and seek them out.  In today’s technologically advanced world, just about everyone is only a call or an email away.

I’d also like to take this a little further!  Not only should be consider the company we keep in terms of people, but also in terms of our thought life and belief systems.  In preparation for our upcoming series on the mind, I charge you to consider what quality of thoughts you are allowing to be a part of your reality.  Of course we all have good days and bad days.  Some days it is easy to be energetic, encouraged and positive.  Other days we may struggle under the weight of a constant barrage of negativity.  However, in general, each of us has a thought-disposition.  Are your thoughts generally thankful, positive, and encouraging?  Or do you struggle with thoughts that are negative, demeaning or pessimistic? Wherever you are on this spectrum observe your thoughts and consider the environment you are creating inside of your mind and ultimately how that may be reflecting in your reality.

Challenge: take today and tomorrow to observe your thoughts.  Take into account what kind of thoughts flow through your mind throughout the day.  Once we have a grasp of where you are, we can determine how to get to where we are going.

Let’s do this together!  Future You is Waiting for Your Arrival.

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Why Is It So Hard to Start?

Have you ever needed to do something and just procrastinated on it until the last minute?

Did you ever think to yourself, once you had finished that task, “Why didn’t I do that sooner?  It wasn’t that hard?”

If this resonates with you, you are not alone!

Many people struggle with getting started!  But the question is, WHY is is so hard to start?

Actually it has nothing to do with your laziness or inability to complete tasks (psst… it might) but REALLY it’s based on SCIENCE. I LOVE science and I LOVE applying physical, scientific realities to spiritual or metaphysical truths.  So, bear with me!

Check out the picture below.  Yes, I could have found a more elegant representation of this but I drew this one! and I wanted to share.

START

This is a picture representation of a simple reaction.  One the y axis (vertical) you can see it measures energy.  On the x-axis (horizontal) it measures the progress of the reaction or TIME.  You will notice you start with the reactants (purple arrow) and instead of going directly to products (at the end) there is a bump up in the graph.  This bump represents what is called the Energy of Activation.  This represents that a certain amount of energy, a SIGNIFICANT amount has to be poured into the reaction in order for it to start.  The green double ended-arrow represents the difference in energy between where you start at and how much you need to begin the reaction.

This is also true about what we aim to achieve in life.  It takes a SIGNIFICANT amount of energy to start.  It requires time, resources, help.  Sometimes we have to completely change our mindsets, or reset our schedules.  However, you will find that once you get started, that keeping the momentum is a lot easier than it was to get started.

This is why it is so hard to start!  It takes a lot!  But guess what?  YOU can do it.  In fact, you MUST do.  If you want to make any changes in life, whether physical, mental, financial, emotional, etc. YOU MUST START!  Yes, beginning will be difficult and require much energy but you are more than capable.

Everything you need, you already have.  Just Begin!

What are you waiting for?  Don’t Delay!  Future You is Waiting For Your Arrival!

 

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The Most Important Non-Renewable Resource

countdown-clock-clipart-7

 

TIME is our most important non-renewable resource.

Think about it. Really pause and think about that.

Every moment you spend is a moment you will never get back.  Whether you spent it mindlessly or marvelously it is gone forever.  Mankind has long been consumed with finding ways to go back in time, stop time from moving forward or reverse the effects of time within our lives.  Unfortunately, that solution has never been discovered.  The fountain of youth has never truly been found. The time machine has never been built.  There has not yet been a way to go back even one second in time.

Time is always, only ever moving forward.  It is always running out.  No matter if you sleep, or stay awake, if your days are filled with joy or sorrow, the one constant is the passing of time.  Every one of us has an appointed time to die and so we are always approaching that point, never retreating from it.

The nature of time calls us to carefully consider how we use it.  We think about water conservation, reducing waste, and other measures but do you ever consider how to conserve your time?  How to waste less of it?  How to use it more wisely?  When you come to the realization of the importance of what you do with your time it can (and should be) life changing.

I used to waste A LOT of time on social media.  Any attempt I made to cut back really ended up in me switching my time wasting from one platform to another.  If I decided to take a break from Facebook, I would end up scrolling endlessly through instagram and performing random hashtag searches.  When I would ban that for myself, inevitable I would end up on Reddit forums until 2 am reading about other people problems and anecdotal stories.  My God!  The amount of time I have wasted.

I realized that I was wasting precious time and even emotional energy on things that brought no benefit back to me.  It was not information that I could use.  It was not information that was stretching my mind or giving me new perspective.  It was, in fact, completely wasted.

I thank God for a shift in my thinking and my approach to how I use my time.  By no means am I perfect.  Trust me, I still waste time, but it is FAR less than I used to and I also feel guilty when I do it.  In this case, the guilt is a motivator for me to shift gears towards doing more productive things.

Consider this week how you are using your time.  A true analysis of your time will reveal what your priorities in life are and what is really important to you.  This is a great starting point for change!  If you want to align yourself to new principles and a new way of thinking or a new way of life spend TIME doing things that feed you, build you up, inspire you and give you fulfillment.

And with that being said, let’s not waste any more time Family!  Future You is Waiting for Your Arrival.

 

XPeace. Power. Protection.